makeshift planters AND YOU

With Spring right around the corner, though we may not realize it due to what seems lack of seasons in Austin, starting organic seedlings in your home can save you hundreds of dollars in buying ‘starts’ at the store, and save your liver whatever horrid genetically modified shit that Monsanto is dedicated to pumping into your body by buying regular produce at the grocery.

If you are a career recycler, or perhaps a hoarder, you probably have various items in your house that could be used for makeshift planters.

Plastic cups, take-out containers, egg cartons, the like. Anything you can jab a hole into and fill with dirt will suffice. Your roommates cat is not an acceptable planter. Please learn from my mistake.

After gathering said items, go outside (or spread some newspaper on the floor, you dirty hippies).

Start jabbing some small holes into the bottoms of the containers. You can make this step as erotic as you’d like. Myself, I have a pen fetish.

 

Since the drought has royally fucked us all in terms of the dirt being dry and the ground being hard, you may need to go out and buy some potting soil.

Oh-and seeds. You’ll need those-unless you’ve harvested seeds from last years plants-in which case you’re so advanced reading this article is only going to make you feel patronized.

Start off on the right foot and go organic.

 

Fill with dirt! ¾ of the way up will be fine, as you’ll be uprooting these babies before their roots get too long.

 

After you’ve properly soiled everything and possibly yourself, use your fingers to poke small indentations in the dirt. Follow the instructions on the packets of seeds you’re planting to see how deep the holes need to be. Some require only a dusting of soil overtop of them while others need to be buried up to half an inch deep.

 

 

Plant-and feel free to use as much space as you can. It occurred to me at this point in the process that I could double my space by using both sides of the egg carton.

 

Next, find a shallow box. Using a deep box can prevent much needed sunlight from reaching your seedlings.

 

 

Next, stuff that box-with plastic bags, newspaper, anything that will prevent water from soaking directly through the box.

Place your makeshift planters in the box-and water. Soak the seeds adequately.

 

 

Now that you’ve poked holes, gotten dirty and played in the mud, planted your seed, stuffed your box, and showered, you have now completed makeshift planters. You will soon have little seedlings that cost you pennies on the dollar.

 

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